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A Quick & Dirty Recap of Henry VIII’s Wives

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Catherine of Aragon

She married Henry’s brother Arthur and then became widowed at 16. Not ideal. Then she married Henry when he became King because nothing could get between this girl and a crown. She had a baby but it was a girl (what an idiot!) so Henry divorced her even though she literally didn’t know what divorce was. It was a wild ride.

Anne Boleyn

Otherwise known as “Annie-six-fingers” was Henry’s second wife who was also stupid enough to have a girl so Henry put her on trial for incest and cut her head off. Apparently she was classy and poised throughout the whole ordeal.

Jane Seymour

Poor Jane was Anne’s Lady-In-Waiting and married Henry just 11 days after Anne was beheaded. Then she had a boy baby ... and then she died from birthing complications.

Anne of Cleves

Anne II was a polarizing figure. Some thought she was a mega babe but others weren’t into it. So Henry sent a portrait painter to her house to capture her likeness before agreeing to marry her. When she arrived at Henry’s joint though he thought she looked nothing like her picture. He still married her but only for a bit before they got divorced.

Catherine Howard

Cathy was Anne Boleyn’s first cousin and married Henry when she was 19 and he was 49. Henry didn’t like how flirty she was with the younger men at court so he had her head cut off obvi.

Catherine Parr

Was named after Catherine of Aragon (I know) and was Henry’s wife until he died. Her hobbies included writing some books and burning others. Good luck unpacking that.


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